2020 is ending and along with everyone I am ready to put this year behind me, but not for the same reasons as everyone else, I believe 2019 taught me how to live through devastation and 2020 humbled me. If 2019, also known as the year of hell, gave me anything, it gave me the ability to see 2020 differently than most people did. I do not mean this insensitively, because my heart breaks for the job loss, the financial troubles of those I see, but mainly my heart breaks most for those who lost loved ones this past year. While the first of those things are temporary, a life is not, and that is what 2019 gave me. The ability to realize that I can give up my job, my financial stability, if it meant the person I love most in life would be standing here today and because of that loss, I think that’s why I was able to live through 2020 in a different mindset.
So, let’s start at the beginning, I started 2020 ready to put the worst year of my life behind me. I was sitting in a great place emotionally. Grief therapy helped me tremendously and I was ready to conquer the world. I joined a gym to get my health back in order, was waking up at 5am to work out every morning, work was great, school was great, and I was slowly inching my way to the one year anniversary of Aaron’s passing. We were hearing the whispers of the COVID-19 virus at this point in other parts of the world, just hoping that it doesn’t reach our shores. February came, I survived Aaron’s anniversary, with some hiccups, but I survived it, and Shane threw me a birthday party to help me get through it as well. It would be less than a month later that work would send me home to work because the virus did reach our shores and I would not return for the remainder of the year. I thought I would hate it, I thought I was going to lose my mind working from home. But I found, that even though I am an extrovert, the energy sucking life, that is office drama was easy to let go of. What did suck, is my newly purchased gym membership was worthless as they were closed to help slow the spread. But nevertheless, my awesome sister-n-law got me into Beachbody, and I started to workout at home instead.
2020 gave me more than I thought it did, looking back, it helped me to find friendship and family, it helped me to realize what is truly important in life. I have stronger relationships with friends because of 2020, and found out that I don’t need to dim my sparkle for anyone, and if you think I am too bright for your taste you can put a pair of sunglasses on or leave the damn room. It helped me to see that memories are more important than material, and to truly be happy in this world all I need is an experience rather than a tangible item. If there is one thing, I miss in 2020 is the ability to hug someone, something I will never take for granted again. I did do a bit of traveling in 2020, spent the 4th of July in Jersey with my in laws, went to the OBX with my sister-n-law, brother-n-law, their family and friends, and also spent a week in the Smoky Mountains with my friends.
The biggest thing to come out of 2020, for me, is the fact that I graduated college. So, with 2020 only days away from being behind us, I cannot wait to push forward into the new year. I’m excited to start a new year fresh, to continue to learn about myself, my strengths and to continue to grow.
So Happy New Year everyone, I hope 2021 brings you joy, brings you happiness, and brings you all your dreams.
A New Year Poem
By: Joanna Fuchs
Happy, Happy New Year!
We wish you all the best,
Great work to reach your fondest goals,
And when you’re done, sweet rest.
We hope for your fulfillment,
Contentment, peace and more,
A brighter, better new year than
You’ve ever had before.
